Legalease

Finally I put up a photo from New Years. Here's the campsite. Slightly longer exposure to capture the light, hence the blurry figures. But it does make for some crisp lights and mood.

Random topic change. If you haven't already guessed: music holds a special place for me. Whether it's playing or listening to it. If you recall, when in Hamburg, I had to buy myself a guitar to have any hope of retaining my sanity. Some may even remember my elation at being given free reign with the law school's Steinway.

But in terms of listening to music, there's an association with a number of songs, artists and albums. For example the Goo Goo Dolls, Led Zeppelin and Crowded House are associated with certain people, whether they know it or not.

So it's always difficult explaining this to others that don't know me that well. I feel some difficulty when having to explain my attraction to music and my compulsion to play any instrument lying round. It feels that this is something that isn't always properly conveyed let alone understood. I can't say it bothers me terribly. However, I certainly would like them to accept it.

Why am I writing this? I really don't know. Probably in an attempt to distract myself from what really has been bothering me - I'm worried I really will become that stereotypically heartless and soulless lawyer. Yes, I've covered this before. But it's a transition that seems to be coming easier and easier.

Let me explain. It's becoming easier for me to fall into the role of an advocate, pushing my client's best interests and only taking into account any emotional aspect if it serves my purpose. Prime example is listening to people in a mediation, letting them release their concerns, while I sit there, nod, listen and take it onboard showing some sympathy only then to use it to convince them to accept the proposal I'm about to give them. Effective. Very effective. But is it a 'good' thing?

Professional aspects aside, I'm also worried about doing the same in my personal life. I am the sort of person who emotionally invests in everything I do. Typically, I'm emotionally candid. But a couple of events over the last whee while have made me stop and consider whether I need to be a little blank, a little separate, a little heartless.

And that bothers me. To have to live less candidly, less open, less honest to simply make things easier. Is this what everyone does? Or just lawyers?

Wellington

Working in a high flying job may be all well and good. But I don't get to enjoy regional public holidays. I missed Auckland Anniversary Weekend because I had to be in Wellington for work. Not that I'm complaining too much. I got to go to the Wellington Cup. Along with 27,999 other people.

It was good times, though when the crowd really became too much we departed back to the city. And I'm glad we did. Apparently a later train back ended up being stuck for 30 minutes, doors closed, inadequate ventilation, crowded and stuffy. Not to mention unbelievably hot.

The other good thing about going to Wellington, other than catching up with as many friends as possible because that's a given, is visiting my dealer - Melting Perfection. Damn that stuff is good. And like a good addict, I'm getting my friends hooked so I don't feel so bad about it. I've successfully turned a couple of people at work. One of the partners will be next.

And yes, I know. I still need to post those promised photos from New Years.

Quickly

Time for updates.  Christmas was great, it was brilliant to catch up with family and friends.  New Years was great too, unwinding on the beach, laying in the sun.  I will put photos up, but I'm too tired to actually upload the photos at the moment.  Soon, I promise.

I will, however, provide you music.  TV on the Radio released a brilliant album last year, Dear Science, and the whole thing is fantastic, layered and complex.  My picks are Golden Age, Family Tree and Lover's Day.

And, as always, work has kept me busy.  Very busy.  And I'm only going to get busier.  This is precisely what I wanted, and probably the best time to be doing all this - young, vibrant, enthusiastic, and of course no commitments, not even a pet.  So a couple of stressful days, a few lost nights of sleep aren't going to do irreparable harm.

Doesn't hurt that I have a few weekends here and there that just make me beam.  Oh, nothing like that.  Just drinks and laughs with friends, sunshine and conversation with new people, and fresh air and strawberries outside of Auckland.

Speaking of which, there seems to be something about Auckland drivers.  Or at least the drivers around Ellerslie.  They seem to have a habit of hanging out windows and yelling obscenities at me.  One such incident involved a guy driving buy, and loudly yelling "homo".  I was puzzled.  Actually, my first thought was what an incredibly small mind he had and how could he possibly consider me, form and then voice that opinion all while driving.  It certainly appeared beyond his capacity.

Until next time.

A New Year

Just to let you know, I am back and will be posting some stuff in the next whee while.

There's Always One

I'm a little concerned. Oh, Christmas was great and being down in Wellington is fantastic. That's not my concern.

My concern is that despite all my efforts to ensure that this blog was kept amongst friends, all steps to ensure it was as far removed from the public domain as possible, it ultimately failed. How do I know with certainty? I have a nifty little tool which allows me to review statistics for visitors to the blog.

Anyways, to cut a story shorter, a link was posted in the forums of a New Zealand site. I uncovered the details of the original poster - the joys of ignorance and publicly available data (By the way if you read this, I would seriously recommend reviewing your thoughts of privacy and behaviour online). I still don't quite know how he found this site. Well, that is other than saying his flatmate showed him this.

So, moral of the story. Some things have been removed, somethings have been edited. The question is whether this continues. I guess I'll think about that over the New Year break.

Holiday Mode

I just wanted to post a bigger version of one those pictures. I remain fascinated by it.


And maybe provide a song for you that equally piqued my interest on the way home to holidays: Bloc Party - Signs.

Until next time.

Briefly

There's not much that's happened between Wednesday and now.  I'm on the crook side recovering from a frenetic week and some virus of cold that has swept through the office.  I guess with everyone working so hard the immune levels drop.  Next thing I knew I was in bed at 7:30 pm on a Friday night sleeping through until 10 am this morning.

Anyways, I'll have some pics, music and thoughts to post soon enough.

Promises Promises

As promised here are some of the photos from previous excursions.

This year Telecom has set up a Christmas tree down at Victoria Park.  I would say it is replete with lights, but the tree itself is comprised lights.  Lights showing distinct colour changes and patterns I might add.  Apparently they only repeat every 1.5 hours.  Which isn't bad.

You might be find this first picture a little odd.

It is taken from inside a phone booth looking up at the tree.  What the....?  I hear you say.  Well, there are 4 booths at each compass point of the tree.  Inside the tree you can dial Santa and leave a message for him about what presents you want, how good you've been and what you'll do to him if he doesn't cough up said presents.  Once your message is complete and you hang up, you're told to look up and you see a string of lights light up blue and head towards the star at the top of the tree.  Quite impressive on a Wednesday night at 1 am in the morning.  I should state this was last week.

This second photo is taken from underneath the tree.  Where you can sit or lie down on bean bags facing upwards taking in the lights and all their psychedelic glory.  It was unbelievably soothing.  Mind you, simply getting out of the office is soothing at the moment, but let's not dwell on that.

And then on Saturday, there was Auckland's Christmas in the Park.  This was taken in the evening around 6 pm.   There were still people arriving, and this photo doesn't capture those people between us and the stage.  Of which there would have been a significant number.  That's the Auckland Musuem up on the hill for those unaware.

And now for some music.  I've been listening to a number of albums on high rotate, and selections from them are as follows:

MGMT - Time to Pretend

Kayne West - Champion

Fleet Foxes - White Winter Hymnal

Glasvegas - Geraldine

Eagles of Death Metal - Wannabe in LA

Enjoy.

Those photos and links

I'll post those promised photos and music links as soon as I get the chance.  Hopefully later tonight.

And I think I've had more comments over the last couple of days than in the last year or so.  Not sure how that happened.

Edited. Somehow this has spread out beyond friends.

It pays to check

I had a couple of posts I had drafted during my wanderings about town that I was going to revisit and add bits and pieces to.  Tis the joy of mobile gadgetry to accomplish such things.

One was a reference to the summer days upon us, complete with links to some complimentary tunes.  All very happy go lucky, and probably quite interesting.  Who knows, maybe I'll post something in a similar form later.

The other post was completely different.  It was going to open up by saying that I had witnessed two people at work break down into tears and shudder with the load of work upon them.  Most people at work this week were near that brink.  It wasn't a pretty week at work.

But I really feel like time has moved on from those posts.  It's like I can't go back and edit them, rewrite them, revisit them.  They are rushed snapshots of that time, darkened at the edges with out of focus details.  It doesn't feel right to show them, and it doesn't feel any better to redo them.  Which is intriguing unto itself.

So instead I write about the snapshot that is now.  I went to a friend's work Christmas function last night.  The theme was Rio-Carnival or Mardi-Gras.  So I went along dressed in a fluffy peach shirt, black and gold vest, tight black pants completed with calf length leather boots.  I thought, and was assured by my friend, that it would be on the lower end of the spectrum for the night.

How wrong I was.  Everyone else showed up in suits with cheesy masks.

But apparently I looked good.  I had the girls from my law firm, upon seeing me before I left, all wolf whistling.  One even commented through her stunned look that I had "an unexpectedly amazing physique".  I was thrown a bit by her frankness.  Though there's nothing wrong in being the office eye candy.

But the best was yet to come.  The CEO of my friend's work approached my friend and told him that I looked very attractive.  He wanted to know if I was single.  Still, it's a compliment.

I may post photos if I can get my hands on some.  And only after I've vetted them for appropriateness. 

Bubble, Bubble, Toil and Trouble

I have seen the height of rudeness over the last few days. But I have also seen some very good times. Drinking French Champagne of numerous varieties, finger food, and laughing about over quizzes has been a good time. This week, though just started, has seen two very polar extremes in my life.

I should refrain from writing more. I am, of course, inebriated. Too much champagne, regardless of quality, will have that effect on people. I had intended to write a lengther post incorporating some interesting tidbits and music. I will, now, leave that until a less fluid moment.

Confessions of a Nice Guy

The statement "all nice guys are either married or gay" is a fallacy.

It should be "all nice guys are married, gay or a few women have spoilt it for the remaining women". Or "only married or gay women can spot the nice guys". Long story made short: to rebuff a nice guy, don't presume. Don't assume. And please be as nice as the guy has been to you.

Anyways, now that I've vented, time for some shiny happy tidbits. Today was the Grey Lynn Park Festival. And the weather was brilliant. Well, provided you stayed in the market area. As soon as you walked up the green hills surround the stalls and stage, the wind would harrass you from all angles.

But it was fantastic. The food was amazing, my personal favourites being the jumbo mussel fritters and the Vietnamese rice paper rolls. Fresh and tasty. The music was entertaining, the masses of people swarming, and the atmosphere just welcoming.

I didn't have my camera, so I stole other people's photos to give you an idea.

The Inner Geek

I know it's been a long time between posts.  Or at least a couple of weeks.  I've been busy, what with work and people visiting.

However, now it is time for some geeking out.  Simplify Media is a gem.  It allows me to stream my entire electronic music library to anywhere I want.  It creates a portal on my home computer to any portal I create elsewhere.  This means I can access my music from work, and most importantly my iPhone.

Why is this important?  It means I don't have to worry about storing the music on anything other than one computer.  All I have to worry about is transfer of data, which is a needless worry over wireless internet.

Okay, now that I've had my geek-out, time for something else.

What I Should be Doing

I should state that what is found within these pages isn't necessarily a true reflection.  It's a reflection, or more precisely a snapshot, of the moment at which I find time.

Sometimes I make the time because I need to unload.  Because I need to share thoughts that have been nagging me.  Thoughts that I need to tease out and see in front of me.  It helps with their digestion.  Much like the previous post.

It's days like today that I really should write about.  The days where I sleep in til late because I had an brilliantly entertaining night before hand.  The days where I wake up, bathe in the sunlight, and meander into town to do the simple mundane tasks I don't have time to really do during the week.  Like book shopping.

I should write about the strolls through suburban Auckland, the solitary figure against the sea of cars.  No one really walks anywhere in Auckland.  It's appalling.  Anyway, I should write about coming home with that sun kissed feel, that smell of sunshine and summer just wafting off my cotton shirt.  I should write about the fact the sun makes my curly hair into ringlets.  Hell, I should have photos of it.

But, I don't.  And that's probably the best thing.  The fact I don't write about those things means that I'm out enjoying them.  It means I have the time to relish them, to find myself busy with life.  I will endeavour though to share more of it.

In the interim, I leave you with Beethoven.  Specifically the first movement of the Emperor's Concerto - piano concerto 5 in E Flat, opus 73.  This always makes me smile, always lifts my spirits.  Enjoy.

Conscientious Ramblings

So I waded right into the thick of work, hence my time being limited to post anything of value.  I do need to get something off my chest though.

I had a mediation today.  At this mediation I represented one of the territorial authorities around New Zealand, as I always do these days.  I helped procure a settlement.  A good settlement in my opinion.  I managed to secure such terms so that the council only paid a fraction of that settlement and in doing so I forced two other parties to sell their houses.  The houses they live in, not some fancy batch on the sunny coastline overlooking the sea.  No.  Their houses.  That they, their respective wives and children live in.

It's hard to swallow.

And to make it worse, at least upon reflection, us lawyers were standing round chatting and gossiping about other claims and nonsense at the end.

But thinking more on it, if we didn't keep going, skipping from subject to subject we'd be tied up in the personal effect.  It was only really on my way home when I reflected on it that I started to think about it all.  I am perpetuating that horrible stereotype of cold hearted lawyers.

Perhaps though it's a front for every lawyer.  I certainly think that I couldn't cope if I paused to linger for too long.  I'm there to do a job, I can sympathise but ultimately I have a client to consider.  Much the same that the lawyers on the other side have a job to do and are more than likely out for blood from my client.  But should it really it be a job, do I have to perpetuate the myth?

Why does this bother me?  Apart from adversely affecting if not ruining people's lives with a swipe of legal argument, I'm worried people may think of me as a cold heartless lawyer.  I'm not.  Or at least I don't think I am.  I was certainly paid an extremely lovely compliment in a mediation not long ago - the claimant didn't think I was a lawyer, apparently I'm compassionate.  That's probably the reason why she left halfway through, somehow I was convincing her that she wouldn't succeed against my client and yes it was unfair but I couldn't do anything about it.

I guess though that it brings some perspective for me.  My silver lining (as we always know I somehow find one to everything).  To know that I can still feel these things, to truly empathise these brutal cold hard facts and keep going and succeed.

I'd certainly worry more if I wasn't affected by these things.

Quick Update

So I managed to survive my intense week of mediations round the country.  All up, I only spent 1 night in my bed in Auckland.  I loved the travels, the simple pleasure of my own company, the focus on the task at hand and, of course, the cut and thrust of argument.

The relentless tide of work that ebbed in during my absence, however, was something I'm not wholly fond of.  But it was certainly worth it.  For instance, how many people can say they took some time off and ended up playing a game of Hurling?

Now it just a matter of settling back into a suitable rhythm.  At this rate, I'll probably find myself arrived at Christmas without realising it though.

Ramblings

It's become ever more apparent over the last week or so that I am, for want of a better turn of phrase, a control freak.

Perhaps that's a bit dramatic.  I don't like not being in control, leaving things in other people's hands is difficult for me to do.  Nigh impossible.  If I can do something I will do it; if I feel like I could do something, I will feel compelled to do it.

This is sounding more like an obsession, and an unhealthy one at that.  I assure you that is not the case.

But I had thought more on the matter.  Most profoundly in relation to the events of last week involving a certain lady.  The thought struck me while watching a movie tonight - I really didn't like the idea of not being able to do anything, make any attempt to overcome the hurdle that is timing.  It's not that I felt helpless, no, far from the contrary.  Knowing me you will know that I am a determined being and timing is not something that will stand in my way.  It's just that on this occasion, there is nothing, absolutely nothing I could do.  And that bothers me.  Why precisely, I can't put my finger on, but I can have a crack - I get the feeling that I have to be in control, a sense of control, or at least the absence of uncertainty.

That's definitely something most people know about me - I loathe uncertainty.  With a passion. I hate not knowing.

I am getting better at dealing with uncertainty, in coping with handing things off and recognising when anything I do will not be of assistance.

Now that I've offloaded that piece of personal information and wanderings, I can rest a little easier.  God knows I'll need it over the coming week with recovering from a mediation on Friday, another on Tuesday and again on Thursday.

There is a light at the end of that tunnel though - I'll be in Wellington and get to have a slight break from my Auckland reality on Friday to Sunday.  Most excellent.

And listen to this - Calexico (or one member) in a black cab with a guitar, live, powerful, and strangely uplifting:

What goes up must come down

Excuse me for the short bleeding heart moment you're about to receive.  I'm a little tired of being understanding, sympathetic and nice.  Well more tired of being called a genuinely nice guy where that isn't obviously enough.  It's like people can't find a compliment, so they reach for the supposedly tried and trusted cliche.  It doesn't work people.

In short, serendipity is definitely a matter of timing and no matter how nice I may be, no matter how genuinely nice or lovely I may be, or happy I make people, it doesn't change time.  Basically, right guy wrong time.  Story of my freaking life.

Thankfully work is providing a haven to lose myself in and I'm preparing for my first mediation closely followed by my second and third within days.  On the brighter note, next week may not be so manic: I may actually be in the office on Monday and Wednesday thanks to an adjournment.

It's times like this that it helps to listen to music with headphones and just letting go like Sir Mick does without caring what people think you look like.  There's a picture of me for you: all gangly arms and legs in a vague attempt at spasmodic rhythm with headphone wires flying in a trail around me.

Random Thoughts

I did more marketing on the weekend - visiting markets and wandering the streets.  It's like being in Hamburg again, but with smaller markets and further to walk between places.  Seriously, Auckland has real problems with the flow from one area to the next.  Wellington never suffered from it, but I'm not going to let that stop me.

What else?  Work is manic, and it hit me today that I have a mediation every week now until the end of November.  Cool, but scary as I'd quite like to have time to actually do work rather than gloss over things with the time I do have to spare.

I also very much recommend Haruki Murakami's Kafka On the Shore or The Wind-Up Bird Chronicles.  People describe Salmond Rushdie as writing magical realism; Murakami is more towards magical surrealism, and based in Japan.  If you had to choose one first, read Kafka.

Now it's time to get ready for the next day at work, I'm looking forward to my escape to Wellington next week.