Conscientious Ramblings

So I waded right into the thick of work, hence my time being limited to post anything of value.  I do need to get something off my chest though.

I had a mediation today.  At this mediation I represented one of the territorial authorities around New Zealand, as I always do these days.  I helped procure a settlement.  A good settlement in my opinion.  I managed to secure such terms so that the council only paid a fraction of that settlement and in doing so I forced two other parties to sell their houses.  The houses they live in, not some fancy batch on the sunny coastline overlooking the sea.  No.  Their houses.  That they, their respective wives and children live in.

It's hard to swallow.

And to make it worse, at least upon reflection, us lawyers were standing round chatting and gossiping about other claims and nonsense at the end.

But thinking more on it, if we didn't keep going, skipping from subject to subject we'd be tied up in the personal effect.  It was only really on my way home when I reflected on it that I started to think about it all.  I am perpetuating that horrible stereotype of cold hearted lawyers.

Perhaps though it's a front for every lawyer.  I certainly think that I couldn't cope if I paused to linger for too long.  I'm there to do a job, I can sympathise but ultimately I have a client to consider.  Much the same that the lawyers on the other side have a job to do and are more than likely out for blood from my client.  But should it really it be a job, do I have to perpetuate the myth?

Why does this bother me?  Apart from adversely affecting if not ruining people's lives with a swipe of legal argument, I'm worried people may think of me as a cold heartless lawyer.  I'm not.  Or at least I don't think I am.  I was certainly paid an extremely lovely compliment in a mediation not long ago - the claimant didn't think I was a lawyer, apparently I'm compassionate.  That's probably the reason why she left halfway through, somehow I was convincing her that she wouldn't succeed against my client and yes it was unfair but I couldn't do anything about it.

I guess though that it brings some perspective for me.  My silver lining (as we always know I somehow find one to everything).  To know that I can still feel these things, to truly empathise these brutal cold hard facts and keep going and succeed.

I'd certainly worry more if I wasn't affected by these things.

Quick Update

So I managed to survive my intense week of mediations round the country.  All up, I only spent 1 night in my bed in Auckland.  I loved the travels, the simple pleasure of my own company, the focus on the task at hand and, of course, the cut and thrust of argument.

The relentless tide of work that ebbed in during my absence, however, was something I'm not wholly fond of.  But it was certainly worth it.  For instance, how many people can say they took some time off and ended up playing a game of Hurling?

Now it just a matter of settling back into a suitable rhythm.  At this rate, I'll probably find myself arrived at Christmas without realising it though.

Ramblings

It's become ever more apparent over the last week or so that I am, for want of a better turn of phrase, a control freak.

Perhaps that's a bit dramatic.  I don't like not being in control, leaving things in other people's hands is difficult for me to do.  Nigh impossible.  If I can do something I will do it; if I feel like I could do something, I will feel compelled to do it.

This is sounding more like an obsession, and an unhealthy one at that.  I assure you that is not the case.

But I had thought more on the matter.  Most profoundly in relation to the events of last week involving a certain lady.  The thought struck me while watching a movie tonight - I really didn't like the idea of not being able to do anything, make any attempt to overcome the hurdle that is timing.  It's not that I felt helpless, no, far from the contrary.  Knowing me you will know that I am a determined being and timing is not something that will stand in my way.  It's just that on this occasion, there is nothing, absolutely nothing I could do.  And that bothers me.  Why precisely, I can't put my finger on, but I can have a crack - I get the feeling that I have to be in control, a sense of control, or at least the absence of uncertainty.

That's definitely something most people know about me - I loathe uncertainty.  With a passion. I hate not knowing.

I am getting better at dealing with uncertainty, in coping with handing things off and recognising when anything I do will not be of assistance.

Now that I've offloaded that piece of personal information and wanderings, I can rest a little easier.  God knows I'll need it over the coming week with recovering from a mediation on Friday, another on Tuesday and again on Thursday.

There is a light at the end of that tunnel though - I'll be in Wellington and get to have a slight break from my Auckland reality on Friday to Sunday.  Most excellent.

And listen to this - Calexico (or one member) in a black cab with a guitar, live, powerful, and strangely uplifting:

What goes up must come down

Excuse me for the short bleeding heart moment you're about to receive.  I'm a little tired of being understanding, sympathetic and nice.  Well more tired of being called a genuinely nice guy where that isn't obviously enough.  It's like people can't find a compliment, so they reach for the supposedly tried and trusted cliche.  It doesn't work people.

In short, serendipity is definitely a matter of timing and no matter how nice I may be, no matter how genuinely nice or lovely I may be, or happy I make people, it doesn't change time.  Basically, right guy wrong time.  Story of my freaking life.

Thankfully work is providing a haven to lose myself in and I'm preparing for my first mediation closely followed by my second and third within days.  On the brighter note, next week may not be so manic: I may actually be in the office on Monday and Wednesday thanks to an adjournment.

It's times like this that it helps to listen to music with headphones and just letting go like Sir Mick does without caring what people think you look like.  There's a picture of me for you: all gangly arms and legs in a vague attempt at spasmodic rhythm with headphone wires flying in a trail around me.

Random Thoughts

I did more marketing on the weekend - visiting markets and wandering the streets.  It's like being in Hamburg again, but with smaller markets and further to walk between places.  Seriously, Auckland has real problems with the flow from one area to the next.  Wellington never suffered from it, but I'm not going to let that stop me.

What else?  Work is manic, and it hit me today that I have a mediation every week now until the end of November.  Cool, but scary as I'd quite like to have time to actually do work rather than gloss over things with the time I do have to spare.

I also very much recommend Haruki Murakami's Kafka On the Shore or The Wind-Up Bird Chronicles.  People describe Salmond Rushdie as writing magical realism; Murakami is more towards magical surrealism, and based in Japan.  If you had to choose one first, read Kafka.

Now it's time to get ready for the next day at work, I'm looking forward to my escape to Wellington next week.

Addiction Comes in Many Shapes

Everyone's been so kind, offering words of encouragement and advice regarding my love life.  And I'm learning something from it all.  The biggest thing is another date with Serendipity.  More on that later.

Another bragging point though thanks to everyone's support is that my new work is freaking sweet, providing a continuous score of adrenaline, stress and subsequent release.  I will beat my goal of doing mediations by the end of the year.  In fact I'll beat it by a long shot - next week in fact.  And not only will I have one mediation to do all by myself, I'll have two in the space of a week.

But wait there's more.  I'll have four in the space of the week, with three on consecutive days.  That's what I'm talking about, that's why I moved firms, that's why I'm into this line of work, and damnit, that's what I'm getting.  My adrenal glands have never been so excited.

But wait, there's still more.  I'm the go-to-man with difficult files and difficult appearances.  Less than 4 months into the job and I'm doling out advice to others, doing people's difficult files and gaining a name for myself in getting something out of them.

And there's bookclub - a group of four or five of us get together once a month and discuss some contempary fiction we've decided to read.  The discussions are stimulating, engrossing and seamless, bounding from one topic to the next.  Tonight was Haruki Murakami's Kafka on the Shore.  Read it.

Life is f%^*ing sweet right about now.  I still miss my routine card games with friends from Wellington.  Nothing beats a good hand of 500.

The Curtain Lifted

What has brought about this flood of posts you may ask.  In that case, I may answer "fine weather, sunshine, and adventures that need to be shared."

I've spent the greater part of the weekend walking.  Ambling from Parnell to town, to Newmarket, and back to Ellerslie on Saturday. Then meandering through Devonport today.  Devonport was brilliant, from the moment I hopped off the ferry I couldn't stop grinning.

You see, I had followed some advice, well more sort of reacted to astonishment.  Astonishment that despite growing up on the North Shore I hadn't really returned to see it all.  That's not entirely true, for I've been back to Takapuna and wasn't horribly impressed.  However, that changed the instant I disembarked the ferry to Devonport from the city.

I saw so many things that were eerily familiar, peeling back the curtain from my memory until a torrent of nostalgia overcame me.  I remembered the beach, the shops, noted that the little museum was no longer there, nor was the cinema from what I could tell.  But the supermarket was there, as was the amazing vistas from the top of various hills.  I followed my feet to the top of Mt Victoria, and the memories tugged my over to Narrow Neck beach where I learnt to sail and somehow remember the time where I discovered Sue had to have different strength lenses in her glasses (which I found most peculiar at the time).  The shop is still there selling icecream too.

There was so much.  I remembered so much more of my little primary school (the lack being of admonished previously).  The bell in its frame near the office, sitting outside leaning up against class room walls eating sausages from the monthly sausage sizzle, the pokey little library, little details that somehow remained.

The point being, I was in a state of euphoria from remembering this all.  Partly because now I can recount it all and not seem like a total fool, but partly because I'd simply forgotten how much I loved Devonport, or more importantly, how much I thrive on being near the water in sunshine.

The only downside is that I did get a little sunburnt, and now have blisters on the soles and top of each foot.  But it was well worth it.

Quickfire

Totally hilarious post from a couple of Wellington blokes about romance and the finance market; the comments are priceless too.

And here's what was referred to in a previous post - Ladyhawke's My Delirium.  Noice.

La Cigale

Serendipity called back.  Patience seems to have more payoffs than I initially realised; still not 100% sold on the idea though.  Patience that is.  Tangents aside, it was lovely and another date is lined up for mid next week.  I have an idea of where to go, it'll just be about sorting out.  I don't like being carless, it makes me feel a little inadequate at these times.

Now onto something completely different.  I highly recommend that if you're ever in Auckland on a Saturday morning, you make the trip down to the French markets in Parnell.  The food there is divine: whitebait fritters, bundles of asparagus, fresh peppers, crisp apples, crepes, beautiful meat, and that's just some of the stuff I purchased.  There's also some amazing looking bread, herbs, flowers (yes, I've noted those for future reference), coffee, spices, and more.

Oh, and there's little mini tarts of the lemon, passionfruit, and strawberry with chocolate.  They are meltingly sumptuous.

I'll gladly take any visitors there.

My Delerium

It's not often of late that there's been more on here other than random musings and comments in the general.  Let alone any real reflection on me.  But like any good thing, here's the exception.

I don't think I'm cut out for the dating game.  I'm rather impatient, like answers then and there, attempt to organise things well in advance, take things personally, and generally jump to conclusions.  I don't know why.  I'd like to think that it's because of the nature of my current employment - a never ending torrent of cases, increasing in intensity and complexity, has infused me a higher sense of organisation and directness.  Brevity, however, is yet to become a custom.  Anyways, we're off topic. 

The point being that perhaps these traits are my downfall.  Time to break with tradition and get into detail.  I met Serendipity, I met a girl.  It was unexpected, and circumstances somehow aligned to meet and have a great time.  The lawyer gods conspired to not only have me appear at a pre-ball, appear fully suited despite not having a ticket to the main event, and meet new people, but meet someone who made me smile with ease.  I hadn't felt that good in some time.  There's actually a bloody great photo (some have seen it), but I won't be posting it here just in case I've said too much already.

Which brings me round to why the dating game may not be for me.  All this leaving fate in someone else's hands isn't something I'm used to doing; wresting control is not a trait that comes easily.  Neither is patience for that matter.  But I do have what she described as ample, and agreeable, disregard for the precepts of man law.  You know, the 3 day rule and so forth.

Well, after my somewhat unsuccessful initial efforts to arrange a catch up despite my rather heavy timetable, I managed to take a deep breath and hand control over it; realising there's not much more can be done by me is hard.

I'm really leaving it all up to Serendipity I guess.

Once in a Blue Moon

I talked to a couple of people recently how my hair hasn't been cut in awhile. It's been around about 6 weeks or less, so that's normal.

What's not though is the curl and the general size of it if I play round a little. Please note that it doesn't look like that with work, nor at any other time, though I am contemplating it. Generally, the curls stay tight unless I tease them out.

These Are Some of My Favourite Things

Music helped me find myself. Again.

Short and simple really.  I had forgotten the pleasure music brings me.  Simply having a soundtrack made me feel a little more complete.  It doesn't stack up to actually playing the piano or guitar, but listening to music while I type is close enough.

Anyways, back to the music.  Music has been pumped out of pretty much every single music device I own, the CD player, the computer, the turntable, and the portables.  Here's a random sampling of what has been heard over the last couple of days.

Kings of Leon - Sex On Fire

Raw.  Plain and simple.  But there's a feeling of restraint underneath it all, an eery feeling of being on the edge of control.  I know the song is on high rotate on the radio, or so I'm told, but damn it, it's worth it.

UNKLE - Broken (featuring Gavin Clarke)

Infectious movement.  I happened upon this at work, and dancing in my office was liberating to say the least.

Lykke Li - I'm Good I'm Gone

There's just something about this Swedish songtress that keeps bringing me back to her.  Admittedly her video clips are somewhat on the eccletic side.  There's also some pretty sweet remixes out there if you're into that.

Well, 3 (almost 4) songs is pretty good.  More so considering I gave you Passenger's brilliant Night Vision Binoculars.  That should keep you sated until next time.

Slap and Dash

Quick treat, a neat little British band called Passenger with their single Night Vision Binoculars.

It's not what it appears, just listen to it.

Perspective

You can probably guess that the lack of posting is due to work. There's been alot of it this week, more so than play, but I'm not complaining too much.

I do know I need to get out and take more photos. It's something I missed, and only realised it until showing some of my photos to friends. It was difficult to explain my efforts to try and convey the reason for taking that photograph, the angle of the light, the shadows creating something mystical, powerful, compelling. Sometimes I worry that the photo doesn't capture it, that its my eyes looking back on the moment that filling in those details.

Do I see something different in these?

In truth, it doesn't really bother me that much. It's mine, I treasure it. And perhaps explaining all this is kind of fun. Geeky almost. And we all know geek is now chic.

Sunday Bliss

Look at this, me posting twice in a week.  What has happened to bring this on?  Domesticated life, vacuuming, mopping, washing, and generally hanging round the house on a lazy Sunday afternoon enjoying the sunshine when I can.

The reason for this brief post, well brief for me, is to inform you all to visit NPR.  Yes, NPR.  Why?  Because there is a plethora of music there, including my absolute favourite - live music.

I'm a sucker for anything recorded live.  Partly because for me, that's when you can capture the passion, the soul, the imagination of the artist and their music.  So go.  Hunt, trawl, and enjoy the fascinating vault it beholds.

It even has Liam Finn amongst the gems.  Go.  Now.

Searching

Another week is coming to a close, and time seems to be slipping through my fingers. I was reminded of that when my sister was in town last weekend. I hadn't seen her in a long time, and so much has changed, for me, for her. But it was great to know that we could connect and have what I considered a fantastic weekend.

That was cemented come Monday when, after her return to Wellington, I was informed she went straight to bed. Partied too hard I guess. Will have to work on her stamina.

Time for some goodies on the blog again - visit The Black Cab Sessions. One Band. One Cab Ride. One Take. It's a hidden gem, god knows how I found it, but it's quite something. View. Listen. Enjoy.

For those scared, or to lazy, to click on links I give you Man Man (yes, it is a band, though the moustache suggests otherwise):

Pretentious as Hell

Live post for you, coming straight from the heart of Auckland city. In the VIP room of an exclusive club with one of NZ's top DJs playing.

Epic.

And my sister is here. Good times. The joys of iPhone mobile data transfer.

Busy busy week

This week has been a medley of emotions.  Not from me.  Rather, I've been on the receiving end of it.

First up there was a mediation, my first if you will.  There were eight parties including the claimant, and only 3 lawyers.  Most parties were pensioners, in their retirement, and overly frustrated at the system and the claim against them.  So needless to say there was a broiler of emotions.  Thankfully, I somehow seemed to be considered a voice of reason.  I'm not sure how it happened, but people listened to me.  Which makes me think I have my 'normal voice' and my 'lawyer voice'.  I can tell when there's a shift, but I don't know what triggers it.  One just sounds more assertive, more certain.

Anyway, I digress.  I wasn't prepared for the emotional onslaught from these parties wrapped up in this claim.  It was hard, but ultimately it's the best result for them in the long term: no trial, no uncertainty in the outcome.

As for the aforementioned arguing lawyers.  Well, Friday proved interesting.  A lawyer and his firm shall remain unnamed, but he tried picking a fight with me over emails between the tribunal and other parties.  It was over a confidentiality issue.  I remained calm, and professional.  He digressed and took things to a personal level.  Not what I would expect from a partner in a firm.  The good news though: I got what I wanted, and he was politely demonished by the tribunal.  Wonder if his actions will have any professional repercussions.

And now, it's the weekend.  Thank heavens.

Sunshine

I had the chance to show Auckland to a visitor. It was refreshing to be able to demonstrate my limited knowledge of some areas and know that my alien eye had seen similar things. It was also a chance to simply use my new spangly camera.

So what follows are pictures from in and around the Auckland Domain. It turned out to be quite a stellar day following the monsoon unleashed on those of us longing for an inner city weekend escape. It was quite a surprise, and something rather different to the night that quickly followed. Namely cocktails and Sing Star. Nothing like alcohol to lubricate the vocal chords or lull you into a false sense of security only to come crashing down when the recording is played back.

High and Dry

The photo to your left is a dry dock for boats. Somewhere the overwhelmingly wealthy store their boats in a valet fashion. Thirty minutes notice and you can have your boat fuelled, primed, polished and ready to go complete with a picnic lunch if you so wish. The good life I guess.

Anyways, I have that photo simply because I had the enjoyable experience of being invited along to a random party there. I was simply told to come dressed nicely and expect women. Lots of women between the ages of 20 and 50. I wasn't told it was a 21st birthday party, so the ages were spread to either end of the spectrum.

Beyond that surprise, there was a definite pleasant surprise in that Nathan Haines was playing. Apparently he knew the birthday girl and her family really well. So that was a fantastic surprise and one that never lost its astounding factor. In any event, Friday night went quite swimmingly despite my initial trepidation.

What else is new? I discovered that the most common response to my answer that I take the train into work every day is "So you don't drive then?" To which an even more bemused look is given when I reply that I do drive, I just don't have a car in Auckland and am surviving with the upmost happiness in experiencing only the congestion of the footpath. Really. Seriously, it's like I'm some distant relic to these people, or they're quickly calculating whether I'm just a suspended driver. I suppose I should take it as a compliment when everyone assumes that I earn enough to support the insatiable appetite of an automotive.

More notes on work - it looks like I will be busy as ever, including an impending week of hell/irreplaceable experience coming up in October. I have 4 mediations in the space of 5 working days. Which is a boon and a curse, in that mediations require an unsurpassable amount of preparation and can take anywhere from 4 hours to 14 hours. The upside, or downside all things considered is that I have 3 out of 4 mediations outside of Auckland: two in Christchurch and one in Wellington.

Chances are I might even get a weekend in Christchurch due to the two mediations there falling on a Friday and Monday; in fact the supervising senior isn't adverse to the idea of skiing on Mt Hutt for that time. Excellent.